Before I hurt my knee back in April, I was doing such a great
job with my health. I was getting lots of exercise in, 5 days a week of working
out, if not more, if not multiple times a day. I was eating right and feeling
great and finding it to be totally easy to do. I was motivated, excited and
feeling amazing.
Then I hurt my knee. I tried to continue with my momentum
but when it comes down to it, Crossfit and wanting to get better at Crossfit is
what drives me to be better. And, while my knee has been healing, I’ve had to
scale workouts so much, not because of skills but because of injury and it just
hasn’t felt the same. While, I’ve still gone to Crossfit, I’ve definitely
slacked and my eating, well….
Let’s just say being healthy is climbing a mountain and I’ve
slid way far back down. Giving up is much easier than perseverance and in a lot
of ways I gave up. I didn’t care. There was so much I couldn’t do and that just
killed my motivation, killed my caring, killed all my good and hard work.
While Joseph and I were at the beach, I went for a walk on
my own. There is something about the beach that is very therapeutic to me. Part
of it is, I can connect to nature without bugs, but another part is that I
enjoy the water and the breeze and the feel of sand between my toes. So, while
Joseph and Emmy played in the waves, I went for a stroll.
Self-consciously, once I felt like I was far enough away
from Joseph and Emmy, I started to try and jog. I hadn’t jogged since before I
hurt my knee and if it was a big dud, I didn’t want to have to talk about it.
And my breathing was on point, my knee felt fine and I jogged the better part
of my mile and a half jaunt. I feel like that jog helped me rediscover the part
of me that cares about being healthy and fit.
Sunday, Joseph let me steal the last beach morning run
before we left and I took off with Zombie Run playing in my earbuds, an app I
hadn’t used in I don’t even know how long. All in all, with walking and jogging,
I pushed myself to do a 5K and it just all felt good (and a little bad, in that
way that working out sometimes make you feel). I honestly could have cried
because I felt good about being active in the first time in a long, long time.
So this is me, sharing my struggle, and my joy. I’m ready to
head back up the mountain.
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